Today I had the real privilege of being able to lead the celebration of life service for one of my closest friends Anne. This is what I said in my reflection :
I came to All Saints in September 2011 with a very lively 2 ½ year old and lots of crazy ideas of what I’d like to do and no confidence how to do them or even if I’d be able to try !! I had a passion for special needs , inclusive church, reaching those outside of the church in creative ways and children and young families !!!
In no time at all I met my soul mate , someone who got me and my crazy ideas , who could understand and engage my son (to become sons ) and who shared my absolute love for 80s music , dancing and gin!
Anne never liked to be in the line light or the centre of attention … unless it was on the dance floor !!! But the first time I met her we clicked and I knew we would be great friends .. something hard to find in this job!
I had the real Pleasure to work with Anne in lots of creative ways , Annr was a licensed evangelist trained by my own mum so I had met anne along with sue and del years before I even came here, we went on , to be chaplains at Abbey Court together , to do the mission shaped ministry course together and to run Up4it .
Anne was also one of my key baby sitters , go to when I needed new strategies to try and understand the special Needs the boys had ,the arms to hug when I need a rant a moan .. ok a lot of moans and these last years a good cry …
We shared wonderful weekends at the Greenbelt festival and our times in the Jesus arms drinking pints and singing hymns and Christmas carols in august will stay with me
Forever. As will drinking home made gin late into the night whilst discussing some of the fascinating theological thoughts and discussions we had heard through the day . Anne and Steve had all the gadgets though they assured me it was nothing compared to Gill abs simon heron at new wine !!
And then there was the gin night crew .. sue J Jackie anne and I would meet every few months pre covid ( and on zoom during ) and for some strange reason it always seemed to fall on the Friday night before a church event .. a walk or litter pick the next day …. Anne swore she measures her gins carefully but I think she must have a different measured than me !!!
All
Of these are special memories to treasure but what I will really miss is Annes loyalty , her dependability , her being there , knowing before I said anything just how I was feeling … sending cards just because … felt hearts in lockdown to remind us she cared … still now I go to text or call her for advice or to share soemthing and remember I can’t and that makes me sad .
In comparison to many of you I only knew anne for 11 years but what ab 11 years they were abs I feel truly honoured to have shared a little bit in her life .
People always ask me how I cope with funerals and I always say .. well you go into professional mode … I have to say today this is really tough !! We are all here because we loved anne and she touched our lives in some way … the only thing that’s getting me through is the knowledge that Anne has begun an amazing adventure she’s become that new creation just like the butterflies leaving the cocoon into eternal life flying on wings like eagles . Anne had such an immensely strong faith she knew God was with her even in the last few days when things were really tough .. she knew her maker was waiting for her and we have that hope too. In the tough times that keeps me going … and in the others sharing memories .. and the odd gin with others who loved her helps !
The fact so many are here today the life of Matthew and Carol helen and Robert are legacies that a bit of Anne will Live on .. she’d hate us to be sad .. but sorry Anne there will be tears … but we will try and dance in the rain just for you !
I ended with a video complied of families from Up4it signing a song which I didn’t notice at the time of filming Elijah went up to the screen and blew a kiss … it nearly broke me!
The service was full of images, music , her signing choir and colour lots of colour!
Tonight I’m beyond exhausted , I miss my friend but I’m sad too and reminded of all the funerals I couldn’t go to because of covid . Most significant my uncle Don’s whose anniversary is approaching, watching your family so upset on live stream is heart wrenching , then there’s Keith my spurs watching buddy , Audrey a beautiful lady from St Nichs, Charlie who was the lead singer in a band with Marc, to name just a few … today for all those with Anne I gave thanks .
I got through today thanks to wonderful friends and my amazing parents . after the service all I needed was a hug from my mummy and I’m so grateful she was there .
Grief is a rollercoaster whether it’s weeks, months or even years since the person died we still remember, we laugh we cry ; but what I learnt today is the significance of being able to do that together in your own way …. For becoming a little bit more me, a little bit braver , a little more rebellious, I thank Anne ! Thank you dear friend for you care and friendship and for being the Tigger to my Pooh Bear !
