Tonight marks exactly 2 weeks since my eventful trip ...chauffeur driven with accompanying flashing lights all the way to Medway Hospital.
For the last 2 weeks I've wanted to say something and I guess little bits have leaked out in statuses here and there but I've not managed to formulate the words needed to express what's really been going on for me.
I'm a rubbish patient , I'm rubbish at being still and I'm rubbish at resting yet I found myself having to do these things for survivial.
When the lovely paramedics came to take me away I have to say hard tough northern Sue was nowhere to be seen, I admit I was absolutely terrified . Although suggested reasons for being so poorly were explained the sheer mention of the words sepsis sent me into shock for reasons many close friends and family will know. Being in resus alone gives you time to think and reflect and pray and my goodness did I pray I was so scared.
Having pneumonia isn't a new thing for me it's the thing that destroyed our Indonesian dream, I was so very poorly that the thought of going through that again was hard to take. 2 weeks in and I feel so much better than I did that first time though I know at least Marc is anxious I don't rush into doing too much for fear of not making a full recovery.
Being ill has been a real eye opener , being on the receiving end of people visiting me rather than the other way round, and I've been pleasantly surprised by how many people from my different t walks of life who've been in touch to check up on me.....especially those teachers from Daniels school and my cousin driving near on 300 miles for 24 hours to make sure I wasn't alone when Marc needed to work!
It's amazing where support comes from in times of crisis and I so appreciate the support I've been given and I hope those who have done that know how grateful I am.
It's been a tough few weeks and I'm sure the next few will be a bit of a struggle as I find my feet, my threshold of energy and my working pattern again but all I can say is I'm just grateful to be alive and especially to those paramedics who will probably never see this that talked me through everything and came back to check on me several times in the night between jobs.
